This is a discussion thread · 10 replies
I stumbled across these Guidelines for Cats and just can't help sharing them. It describes my cat's behaviour waay too much! Especially the doors part. Those who have cats will completely undestand my amusement. Or is that applicable for dogs as well?
Here is a summary:
Do not allow closed doors in any room. To get door opened, stand on hind legs and hammer with forepaws. Once door is opened, it is not necessary to use it. After you have ordered an "outside" door opened, stand halfway in and out and think about several things. This is particularly important during very cold weather, rain, snow, or mosquito season.
Always accompany guests to the bathroom. It is not necessary to do anything . . . just sit and stare.
- When supervising cooking, sit just behind the left heel of the cook. You cannot be seen and thereby stand a better chance of being stepped on and then picked up and comforted.
- For book readers, get in close under the chin, between eyes and book, unless you can lie across the book itself.
- For knitting projects or paperwork, lie on the work in the most appropriate manner so as to obscure as much of the work or at least the most important part.
As often as possible, dart quickly and as close as possible in front of the human, especially on stairs, when they have something in their arms, in the dark, and when they first get up in the morning. This will help their coordination skills.
Always sleep on the human at night so s/he cannot move around.
This is an important part of your life. Get enough sleep in the daytime so you are fresh for your nocturnal games.
Cat Games - Catch Mouse
The humans would have you believe that those lumps under the covers are their feet and hands. They are lying. They are actually Bed Mice, rumored to be the most delicious of all the mice in the world, though no cat has ever been able to catch one.
Warning: Playing this game to excess will result in expulsion from the bed and possibly from the bedroom. Should the humans grow restless, immediately begin purring and cuddle up to them. This should buy you some time until they fall asleep again.
Any small item is a potential toy. If a human tries to confiscate it, this means that it is a good toy. Run with it under the bed. Look suitably outraged when the human grabs you and takes it away. Always watch where it is put so you can steal it later.
Anonymous:ROTFL This is just astonishing how people notice those little naughty habits of cats!
Anonymous:These are all true, my cat (Prince) Pimlico does all of these, he sits on the top rung of the stairs, when I awake in the morning and scratches the carpet (which reminds me that I have to get a new carpet, 'little blighter'). He will not let me pass (as scratching and lying on the top of the stairs blocks my way), until I have used the toilet facilities. He is such a dote.
Thanks for all of these, they made me laugh
People are waiting to help.