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Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

Life lessons learned from a dog

1. If you stare at someone long enough, eventually you'll get what you want.
2. Don't go out without ID.
3. Be direct with people; let them know exactly how you feel by pissing on their shoes.
4. Be aware of when to hold your tongue, and when to use it.
5. Leave room in your schedule for a good nap.
6. Always give people a friendly greeting. A cold nose in the crotch is most effective.
7. When you do something wrong, always take responsibility (as soon as you're dragged shamefully out from under the bed).
8. If it's not wet and sloppy, it's not a real kiss.
The following breeds are now recognized by the AKC:

Collie + Lhasa Apso
Collapso, a dog that folds up for easy transport

Spitz + Chow Chow
Spitz-Chow, a dog that throws up a lot

Pointer + Setter
Poinsetter, a traditional Christmas pet

Great Pyrenees + Dachshund

Pyradachs, a puzzling breed

Pekingnese + Lhasa Apso
Peekasso, an abstract dog

Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel
Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as a whistle

Labrador Retriever + Curly Coated Retriever
Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists

Newfoundland + Basset Hound

Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for financial advisors

Terrier + Bulldog
Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes

Bloodhound + Labrador
Blabador, a dog that barks incessantly

Malamute + Pointer
Moot Point, owned by....oh, well, it doesn't matter anyway

Collie + Malamute
Commute, a dog that travels to work

Deerhound + Terrier
Derriere, a dog that's true to the end

Bull Terrier + Shitzu
Oh, never mind....
Whar does a lazy dog chase? Parked cars!
Can you please explain the joke? I'm a foreigner and don't understand it. Emotion: sad
A man and a dog walk into a bar.
Man: "I will bet you the cost of a drink, that my dog, Rex, can talk."
Bartender: " ok, lets see it."

Man: "Rex, what do walls hold up?"
Rex: "Roof"
Man: "Rex, what is sandpaper like?"
Rex: "Rough"
Man: "Rex, who was the greatest baseball player of all time?
Rex: "Ruth"

Bartender: "Get out!!"
As they walk away Rex looks at the man and says, "Maybe I should I have said DiMaggio?"